Truth Uncovers Love
So I learned in class today, as we were discussing Lacan, as cited by Slavoj Zizek through an example in Pride and Prejudice by Jane Austen, that to grasp Truth in a psychoanalitical (Lacan) way is to misrecognize it.
At their first encounter, Darcy and Elizabeth falls in love, but because of their difference in social status and class they failed to recognize each’s true intentions. Because of Darcy’s pride, he regards his affection unworthy, thus he appears to dismiss her world and expects Elizabeth to honorably accept his proposal. Her prejudice casts him as a vulgar, high class arrogant and vain. Therefore she refuses his proposal. Both neglected or misinterpreted or read an inverse message from each other. After their break up, adventures of coincidences reveal their true feelings of love as it appears to both characters. Darcy finally recognizes Elizabeth is his sensitive and tender nature, as he is her dignity and wit.
Indifferent to Lacan’s concept of love, it is my belief the process of uncovering the truth, which will ultimately draw to love, does go through a process of misrecognitions. In part, for it is a process, an experience that will draw strength to future relations with the supposed “loved” partner. Although one does not have to go through the rigorous misadventures of Darcy and Elizabeth, misrecognition can be noticed through idealistic first impressions of our spouse. If we recall they are misrecognitions in the form of denials, doubts, resistance, anxiety, ignorance, and other negative responses of our spouse. This process is curiously certain and unavoidable. It has manifested or developed through stages in our formalization of the self.
So how do we deal with this uneasy misrecognitions? There is no empirical solution but metaphysical, in fact it may transcend to holistic methods. I propose to simply believe and have faith. Belief is built upon lessons from our growing environment, society and community, and pedadogy. Where as faith is drawn upon a collection of experiences that we accept as foundations to alleviate the self, therefore creating a feeling of confidence. Those two, I believe, are essential in relieving the feeling of pain or disappointment from misrecognition.
Another way would be to “be tough.” Ignore the pains and seek the truth, or wait and live our routinity as the truth reveals itself in due time. The truth, which we initially fail to recognize will ultimately disclose itself, as it has to me and my spouse, which lead to optimistic jubilances of love. Our story of course is different and unique, as many other people are, and dissimilar in the range of the time to unveil this truth. I am fortunate and perhaps blessed to have a insignificant amount of time in this process.
So, bear with it and sweat it out. Let love surface.
